1 Authentic Woman

Sunday, December 10, 2017

A New Weight Loss Program



GUEST BLOGGER***Karen Thomas****

With the new year just weeks away, change seems to be on everyone's mind.
Many see the new year as a time to do things differently or a new chance to change the things that they feel are keeping them from living their best life. So they make New Year's resolutions which brings promises of new love, new money and a new life.  One of the top resolutions that is often made is the resolve to lose weight.  People start the year out meal planning, starting diets and exercise programs all in hopes of losing those few extra pounds, only to find themselves 2-3 months into the new year giving up.
I'd like to submit to you that perhaps there is a different type of weight loss that needs to take place in this new year that may help with not only losing pounds but also with your finances, love life and business as well. 
This weight loss will get you in touch with the Authentic you.   I call this emotional weight loss.    With this weight loss regimen, you don't have to change your physical diet but you will have to change your mental diet. Let's take a look at this plan.  

What do I need to lose?

1. Negative self-talk.    What do you say to you when you make a mistake?
2. Naysayers.  Who do you allow to speak to you about your dreams?
3. Procrastination.  Procrastination can be the killer of dreams
4. Unproductive Relationships.  Do they cause you to grow and be better?
5. Fear.  This will keep you stuck. 

How do I lose this weight (the exercise program)?

1. Change how you speak to you. When you feel the urge to speak negatively about you, stop, breathe, and change your words...say the opposite.
2. Change your confidants.  Don't tell your dreams to those who don't believe in you or can't dream with you.
3. Take action.  Stop taking so much time contemplating and thinking about what to do and just do it. 
4. Change your friendships and relationships.  Understand that everyone is not equipped to be in your starting line-up (sports reference).  Some are meant to be on the bench, in the crowd and some are cheerleaders.  Learn who is supposed to play which position and put them there. 
5. Do things that scare you. I have found this is one of the ways to overcome some of your fears; the others, you'll just have to close your eyes and leap.

How do I maintain the weight loss (the meal plan)?

1.  Daily Affirmations. Say something great about you daily
2. Vision Board.  Write the vision so that you can put your eyes on it daily. Get it ingrained in your mind.
3. Continue to move forward. Give your goals dates and let nothing distract you.
4.  Don't be afraid or feel guilty about letting people go. Understand that everyone has a purpose in your life, figure out what their purpose is and move accordingly.
5.  Imagine what you could do if there was no fear. 

This is just a brief outline on how to get started to what is  your most important weight loss. This weight loss can not only lead you to losing physical weight but also losing the mental and emotional weight clears the way for finances, greater relationships and careers to reach you. Most of all it opens up the door to being your Authentic self!

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Karen Thomas, Founder/CEO of Sistas Healed & Empowered , is a natural motivator and talented life coach.  She uses her talents to help women make positive life changing decisions while coaching them to find peace during transition. Karen spent time working with women in transitional housing and public housing to help them gain independence after homelessness and incarceration.  As a mother of one daughter, Karen is a very active mother to not only her biological child but to many other children across the country.  Karen’s vision incorporates her desire to see women excel in life and overcome obstacles that have the potential to stifle their growth.  As she uses her own life experiences to teach and coach women she does so with transparency and an authentic spirit of love, compassion, and understanding.  Today Karen continues to offer her expertise to women everywhere through individual coaching, seminars, webinars, and speaking engagements. 

To contact Karen, please do so via email at sheismybiz@gmail.com
Twitter: @she_atx
Facebook: www.facebook.com/sistashealedandempowered

Friday, December 1, 2017

The Power to Re-invent Yourself



GUEST BLOGGER***Alicia Buchanan****

New year, new you, right?  It’s totally cliché and everyone is saying it. But waiting for a new year resolution is not always promised to us. You’ve played the game all year long, been the good girl, helped everyone else. Now it is time to help yourself get off that emotional rollercoaster of life happening. 

Why not get a fresh start today and do what you planned to do last year? So what, things didn’t go according to your plan.  Start fresh again.  Relinquish your power to God and let go of disappointment. Disappointment can paralyze your dreams.   It is related to failure and not too far from fear.  Kill it now. Do something bold.

Whether this means getting a new job, moving across town, taking that trip abroad, starting your own business, letting go of a toxic relationship or letting go of stuff that doesn’t work for you, do something courageous that you have never done. 

You have the right to live your best life like Oprah says. 

No one is perfect, even the strong Black woman needs help most of the time.  Contrary to our cultural conditions to remain silent about what we are facing or think that our stories do not matter, it is not harmful to embrace our true reality. 

Don’t fall victim to comparing yourself to anyone else.  They have their own story.  This is all about you and you have permission to be selfish.
Honestly, outward appearances and impressions are deceiving.  Most men and women strive to have what they feel is the perfect marriage, kids, house, luxury  vehicle, six figure salary and a good relationship with God and overall healthy wellbeing.
 
Again these outward appearances can be deceiving.

Since beauty is in the eye of the beholder, it is not always wise to compare the outward appearances of other people’s lives to your own.
Falling into the trap of wanting what other people have can be deadly. Yet, not dreaming at all can be just as deadly.  Awaken your own dreams.  Purpose it in your heart to be all you can be.

If you have lived a comfortable safe life all of your life, this may be a hard pill to swallow.
Let’s start from the beginning.

“Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved” (Psalm 55:22).

 
 
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Alicia Buchanan is CEO of Golden Opportunity to Develop and Alicia Buchanan Ministries – a personal development connoisseur and faith based mental health support for women and families, Founder of the Soulful Sister Searching Movement, Author of From Exile to EMBRACE: 7 Secrets to Lead a Happier Life Through Love and Forgiveness, life/relationship coach and transformational speaker.

Connect with me: http://aliciabuchanan.com/

 


Friday, November 3, 2017

How to Maintain Your Authenticity When All Hell Is Breaking Loose.

           Not very long ago I woke up and realized that I have a few gray hair.  I suppose that happens.  I am 47.  I did become a Mei Mei in September a little more than a year ago. Hmmm, I wonder is it is because I had been letting my hair grow out....I am looking OLD, older than I ever have.  One of the supervisors looked at a picture of me and said," you look so young".  Well damn, that was just months ago!!!  I couldn't have aged that quickly!  Ok, haircut here I come. See you soon Trina! My clothes are KINDA fitting ok.  Pinky said that I am looking older.  I looked in the mirror....I do look like I am aging. It ain't looking too graceful either!  I have good genes. This isn't suppose to be happening. 
          I have been having some stresses, strains and struggles.  It is certainly showing.  My kids...TRIPPIN'. My oldest niece, DEFINATELY has lost her mind!!  Business things, behind!  Work...smh, I won't comment. What the FRENCHTOAST?! Wait onnnnne flipping minute! I am doing everything that I am suppose to do. I am doing everything that I can do. This has been going on for months.  The only thing that has been consistent is INCONSISTENCY.
S L O W D O W N
Are you serious? Is this a tingling in my right arm?!
Let's rewind.....inhale and exhale
Think what is going on here?
I have always believed that things happen for a reason.  The reason, many times has nothing to do with us nor should it be taken personal. Yeah, I believe in forces beyond the natural and their attacks but he isn't making that much happen. He is just messing around enough to discourage me, to block me, to prevent me from moving into my destiny, to put the fire out in my passion.
SO, how can I maintain my authenticity when ALL HELL APPEARS TO BE BREAKING LOOSE.
          Connect with positive people. People that will breath freshness into your spirit. People that will infuse you with positivity. People that will challenge you to ignore the temporal. This is a period that a GREAT change is about to occur. How do I know?  I know because I have believe in bible promises.
          Do what you love. Do you even know what you love anymore?! Do you remember that thing that made your heart smile? We spend a lot of time talking about what we don't want to do, say, see or even happen but there is less time spent on what we want to happen.
          Take a risk and try something new or adventurous. There are times that you hear your mind say," try it, do it". Listen and operate in doing that new or adventurous. Take a class, invest the money! Cut and or color your hair! Take yourself on a drip! Go to that new restaurant that you have passed a million times and wondered what the food is like.
          Do something for yourself.  At a month ago I got a haircut and color. If you have been flowing me than you know that my hair has been purple for two years. I cut the left side and added purple extensions.  I purchased a round trip ticket home to Chicago and a concert in celebration of my 47th birthday AND my new found freedom. Many times as mothers, as women, we put everyone else FIRST....then we neglect our needs wishes and desires.  In the event that we do purchase or do something for our self we feel guilty, ashamed and will go as far as returning or even consider returning whatever it was that we purchased for ourselves. Some of us will take it back and have the feeling of satisfaction as we shuffle out of the store with return receipt in hand and stuff the change into our purse.
The world will forever go on around you! Your self talk is strong, on the negative side. Cast your cares on HIM because He cares for you. Peace of mind comes piece by piece. Your strength is in your knowledge of the FACT.....You are a perfect idea in God's mind.

Be Authentic
Be Great


      


Sunday, October 29, 2017

Feeling Some Kind of Way

I have heard that phrase "feeling some type of way" for a few years. I never really understood what that meant. How could you NOT know what way you feel? That doesn't make sense to me. It is ok to have an emotion. Live that emotion: anger, fear, hurt, disappointment, discouraged....whatever that feeling is, FEEL IT!!! Emotions aren't weak. Emotions are HUMAN. Emotions are what set us aside from all other animals on the planet.
Do you not want to feel vulnerable? Is there something wrong with feeling vulnerable? Are you concerned what people would think of you if you said what it is that you feel? Do you know what you are feeling?
I think there are several reasons that people in general and woman....specifically: women have been taught that there is no strength in vulnerability, women are concerned how others SEE them, woman are concerned what others THINK of them, woman are concerned with what others FEEL about them. We have lost our nature to nurture and because of that we FEEL SOME KIND OF WAY when it comes to our emotions.
We aren't safe nor secure in who we are, therefore it is difficult for us to accept the emotion that we feel. We are ill equipt to live in our authentic emotion which makes it difficult to live an AUTHENTIC lifestyle. The fast few days I had been at a level of emotion that I didn't understand. There were a multitude of emotions swirling around, so much so it activated a bout with eczema. I was angry, frustrated, sad and crying. That wasn't " some kind of way" that was EXACTLY what I said it was feeling! I was sad because I looked at a memory of a gift that a received from someone that I loved in the past. I was frustrated and with my children. I was crying because I was overwhelmed.
It is normal to have emotions. Your options are to decide to have your emotions or let your emotions have you. Letting your emotions have you means that they control how you operate your day to day life. Many times our emotions can betray us. They betray us every time we are unsure of the emotion, why we have the emotion every time we make a decision based on that TEMPORARY feeling.
I am angry. I am sad. I am disappointed. Why is it always the "negative emotions" that are labeled with that verbiage?Stop saying," I feel some type of way". Say...I am not sure what this is then INVESTIGATE what it is and why you feel that way. When you take the opportunity, it allows you to learn more about yourself and how best to navigate in that moment. In the even that feeling erupts again, you know what that feeling is and are better prepared to operate. Learn how to accept the emotion and even accept what caused the emotion to erupt.
Today is NOW, tomorrow has passed stop missing out on life, "feeling some kind of way"!
I love you
#BeHappy
#BeAuthentic
#BeGreat

Sunday, October 15, 2017

When Is Enough, Enough?

When Is Enough Enough?
It is so interesting how we live a life of more than enough but it isn't enough. That doesn't make sense does it? We have had enough of people but still maintain connection with them. We have had enough of work yet continue to get up daily going to a place that we are sick of. We continue to maintain a status quo in a life of convenience and comfort. We maintain connections with people, places and things that don't fulfill us. Why?!
Fear of what people might think or say about us. Fear of not meeting expectations that other set for us. Ashamed to even say what it is that our heart truly desires. Do we even know what I hearts desire anymore? Do we know what it means to live life on our own terms? Do we know what happiness really is? Do we really know what life is? Do we know when enough is enough?!
I have heard so many people say that when they reached that moment of enough...they just simply QUIT. They quit jobs, quit mates, stopped going to places, quit answering calls, stopped answering questions, quit wasting time. Maybe they snapped!! They went to work one day and said," I am tired of this". They turned over and looked at their mate," there has got to be more than this". Or even said....I just am not filling fulfilled and need to do what really makes my heart smile. In that moment, that very moment, is when the AUTHENTIC switch switches on. That isn't the last time.
Every time, we say yes to our own happiness and not to pleasing someone else the light flickers brighter. Don't misunderstand me...being selfish and being self FUL are two different things. Being self FUL allows you to be good to yourself which in turn allows you to be your best for others. It is more about joy, an internal happiness, no matter what is going on around you...your heart is still happy. You are still moving forward in your personal best success.
When you are moving forward at your best it allows you to be better for those around you. It allows you to be a better mom, sister, friend, daughter, employee, employer or how ever many hats you wear. Have you reached your enough moment? When will you know? What do you do?

Stop trying to be strong for everyone because you have had ENOUGH of that!